Tom Cruise has jumped off the Stade de France, and we all know what that means: the Games of the XXXIII Olympiad are over and the next Mission Impossible is going to be kind of lame. Jumping off a stadium roof with wires attached to yourself? Come on, Tom, that’s the kind of stunt you would’ve done like five movies ago. Getting soft, are we?
The best part of the Paris Olympics was obviously the soccer tournaments, and that’s coming from a completely unbiased source. We saw some fantastic footy in both the men’s and women’s competitions, with Spain putting on a clinic on their way to being the only nation to make the semi-finals in both, and the general enjoyment of some magnificent storylines.
I could write books about this grand finale to the Summer of Soccer, but alas, I am far too lazy to ACTUALLY write a book. Someday I will, but today is—say it with me in your best Ty Pennington voice—not that day! Instead, I’ve picked out a few of my favorite stories from across this year’s Olympic soccer slate, and I must say, there was no shortage of stories to choose from. If you watched, reminisce with me. If you didn’t, it’s about time you got caught up. Here we go!
Women’s: 12 Years Coming
- USA
- Brazil
- Germany
The big story here is gold, shiny, and back where it belongs, but we’re saving that for last. Once I start talking about the USWNT, we’re not going back to the rest of the field. Let’s start with La Furia Roja instead.
As I mentioned before, Spain advanced to the semi-finals, where they ultimately fell to Brazil—who they beat in the group stage—and lost the bronze medal match to Germany. It was a tough end to the tournament for the reigning World Cup Champions, as rising powerhouse Colombia pushed them to the very brink of elimination in the quarterfinal before Brazil walloped them 4-2 in their rematch. The talent on the Spanish roster is undeniable, but when the matches mattered most, they just couldn’t muster the dominant form that propelled them to the top last year in Australia.
Spain’s journey was closely intertwined with silver medalists, Brazil, and they’ve got to be the next storyline we recap. The Canary Yellow had a polar opposite tournament to their Spanish counterparts, starting the tournament with group stage losses to Japan and Spain and only making the knockouts as a third-place team after their win against Nigeria. It looked pretty bleak early on; lackluster performances and a suspension for Marta could have easily put their hopes in the dumpster, but Joga Bonito is not so easily disheartened. With a high press and younger legs on the field, Brazil surged into the final and put up quite the fight against the USA.
Before we get to those golden Americans, we have to talk about Canada. Oh, Canada, what have you done? That isn’t a bird. It’s not even a plane. It’s a red and white, maple-leaf-clad Canadian spy drone flying over the New Zealand national team’s practice. And, guess what? That drone has BEEN flying for years. I’ll spare you the gritty details, but the Canadian Soccer Association got caught red-handed for some less than sportsmanlike spying that goes back a few years. As a consequence, they were given a six-point penalty in this year’s Olympics, and head coach Bev Priestman was let go mid-tournament.
But did the players give up? No way; that’s not how they roll in the Great White North. The Canucks won all three of their group games, securing second in their group and building some seriously impressive momentum in the face of adversity. They then took the eventual bronze medalists to penalties in the quarterfinals, falling to the impressive performance of Ann-Katrin Berger in net. Resilience is resilience, no matter why it was required; good on you, Canada.
One last thing before the main event: a word on Germany. Die Mannschaft was dangerous all tournament long, and though they lost their first run-in with the USA 4-1, the scoreline didn’t do them justice. They thoroughly deserved their third-place medal and were unlucky to have fallen into such a difficult side of the bracket. Now here we go; on to the champions.
From start to finish, this USWNT looked like the real deal. Three wins for three in the group set them up well, a hard-fought quarterfinal against a disciplined Japan showed their grit, and a second win against Germany proved that none of it had been a fluke. They were pushed to their limits, but they always bent without breaking. The attacking trident of Sophia Smith, Trinity Rodman, and Mallory Swanson was a constant threat, while the often superhuman defending of Naomi Girma set the Stars and Stripes up for four clean sheets out of a possible seven. That’s dominance, if I’ve ever seen it.
Since women’s soccer was added to the Olympics in 1996, the USA has medaled in all but one of the seven competitions. Five out of those seven medals have been gold (1996, 2004, 2008, 2012, 2024), one silver (2000), and one bronze (2020). In short, the USWNT has dominated the Olympic games, and while other nations have strengthened their teams substantially over the years, the USA has led the way from the outset. With their return to the top of the podium, this generation has reminded the world of the standard set by the legends that came before them, and they did it in style. Well done, Emma Hayes, and well done to each one of these extremely talented players.
Men’s: Dominant Double
- Spain
- France
- Morocco
It was an exciting tournament on the men’s side as well, and while the USA didn’t medal in this one, they pushed the boundaries of their Olympic achievement. As I’ve mentioned previously, the men’s soccer competition at the Olympics is restricted to U23 players, with three age exceptions allowed per country. This takes away some of the prestige of the competition—as many of the world’s best players are absent—but it doesn’t diminish the honor of representing your nation at the Olympics or the competitive nature of the games themselves.
For the USMNT U23s, it was the first Olympic appearance since 2008 in Beijing. The Stars and Stripes failed to advance from the group that year, but they managed to handle a group with France, New Zealand, and Guinea with relative ease this time around. A 3-0 loss to France in game one didn’t do justice to the way the game played out, while big wins over New Zealand and Guinea were thoroughly deserved. Morocco showed the young Americans that there’s still work to be done to ascend to the world’s elite with a 4-0 drubbing in the quarterfinal, but the takeaways from the tournament as a whole should be nothing but positive. Onward, forward!
Morocco was among the most exciting stories of the tournament, earning a bronze medal and proving to the world that they truly are among the elites of not just African soccer but world soccer as well. The Atlas Lions’ resounding 6-0 win over Egypt in the bronze medal match showed that their tournament run was no fluke, and it was so fun to watch. Achraf Hakimi may very well have been the most talented player at the tournament; just look at his solo goal against the USA. Truly scintillating stuff.
While the future looks bright for Morocco, it was Spain’s performance that surprised me most. We all knew they had talent, but this wasn’t on my bingo card. Euro champions AND gold medalists? Crazy. Issues in the administration and leadership of the federation aside, the Spanish FA seems to have rediscovered that magical player development that brought them to the top in 2010, and it’s paying dividends.
Before we officially tie the summer up, we've got one more story that hits close to home. There were plenty of MLS players representing their nation’s in Paris, including a Loon. MNUFC’s very own Michael Boxall played all 270 minutes of New Zealand’s Olympic games, helping his home nation earn a win against Guinea. While the Kiwis didn’t advance beyond the group stage, Boxall acquitted himself well, and it’s nice to have him back in Minnesota.
With that, the Summer of Soccer is well and truly over. Pour one out, please, for what was an incredible few months of international action. Congratulations to Spain (x2), Argentina, and the USWNT on claiming their respective titles, and better luck next time to the rest of the field. I hope you got your fill of tournament soccer this season, and I hope you’re ready for more MLS, and for those of you who celebrate, the return of European club soccer as well. Goodbye Summer of Soccer, hello Fall of Football!
Fall of Football is an (un)official trademark of Coach Kyle Hayward’s Soccer School Corporation and refers to Association Football—otherwise known as the beautiful game—not American football, though that will likewise take place in the fall. I know, it’s confusing stuff. My recommendation for maximum fall enjoyment is to watch the Loons, a few European soccer games, and Ohio State football. And maybe visit an apple orchard or two.
